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Tuesday, December 13, 2011

A Day in the Head of Ana

Sometimes, I think I could be institutionalized based on the things that run through my head. Or have my IQ drop. A lot.

Here are some of the thoughts that ran through my head on Monday. Well, the ones I remember.

  • Of course you didn't set your alarm to wake up, but the one to leave. Get up and move it, sister.
  • I really need to tweeze my brows.
  • I swear my mind knows I'm going to oversleep when it has me set out my clothes the night before.
  • What ring made those marks on my finger?
  • Oh. That's a band aid.
  • You don't own a ring that fits your index finger.
  • That really is a bad place for a cut. 
  • Ow.
  • Pat yourself on the back for remembering to grab your nail polish for touch ups.
  • You are totally to be congratulated for the Bronco's win since you were cooking yesterday when they scored.
  • What was I doing?
  • Effing WebSense.
  • G damnit, Lotus Notes, your one job is to send and receive emails. DO IT.
  • No really, Lotus Notes, I would chuck you onto the side of the road if you weren't connected to everything else.
  • What was I doing?
  • Alright, Help Desk, update your hold music.
  • Is that another snag in my tights?! Damnit.
  • What was I doing?
  • Ugh.
  • Is that a cape?
  • Someone should tell him he's lost in his wizarding world with those University of Indiana sweatpants. 
  • The Hoosiers should depants him for besmirching their legacy.
  • He clearly needs a parent figure or girl to tell him "NO".
  • Really? You want a vanity plate "PUGLVER"?! Are you sure you're not gay?
  • Yeah, I think you might be. 
  • Not that there's anything wrong with that, but even gay guys wouldn't let you get that vanity plate.
  • Oh dear lawd, I have to ride this insanely long escalator. Don't hyperventilate.
  • It's ok. Just look down. Don't look up.
  • Oh lawd. Vertigo. Look down, look down!
  • I love working from home. 
  • UGH. Why is my download speed so slow?
  • Effing Comcast.
  • I really don't like working from home.
  • I need two screens.
  • Ugh.
  • What do I want for dinner?
  • How about a half recipe of no bake cookies.
  • I bet I could sub ingredients to make them healthier. 
  • Nope. I cannot. They taste like burnt tar.
  • Good thing I got the real ingredients.
  • Ew. How do you clean tar out of a saucepan?
  • UGH.
  • I should blog.
  • Is that a mark from a ring on my finger? 
  • Nope. Still a band aid.
  • What was I doing?

It's one of those Mondays. Surprisingly, I have a day chalk full of meetings today and I am donating blood. (Yay me! Universal donor, O-, wha wha!!) Should be a fun and potentially woozy day.

4 comments:

  1. Dude, I could definitely be institutionalized, too. Maybe we could be roomies? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice! I think everyone has the random dialogue with themselves, though few are willing to admit it so publicly. :)

    ReplyDelete